Why I'm Ashamed of Being A Church Member
I am ashamed of being a church member. There is no way around it. So, let's get it out of the way right now, I am sick and tired of going through the motions and doing church on a weekly basis. Why? I am glad you asked.
Sadly, nothing jogs your conscience more than a movie depicting genocide. Personally, I believe the producers of Hotel Rwanda nailed it. They accomplished what they set out to do. I am absolutely shattered after watching it. On one hand, I am brought to share in the common experience of all mankind; evil, suffering, and pain. Yet, on the other I share it from the safety and comfort of my living room. My heart is strained by the realization that this is a recent event, and although my desire is to be part of the solution, I am simply going to eat some fried chicken and go to bed with my wife.
My mind is set on overdrive. I know that there are similar atrocities occurring as I write this and as you read it. Yes, some are occurring in our back yard, and I promise, many are occurring all over the world. And let's face it, our country cannot be the police of all foreign affairs. Our foreign policy is only as good as the economic interest we have in a particular conflict. Unfortunately, shed blood does not automatically equate to revenue,
So I am led to wonder, "What hope is there of humanity?" Obviously, we exist in a bubble. A fat, wretched, conceited, immature, pretentious, ignorant bubble. We wine and dine as the world burns. We are fools, having sunken so far into self-aggrandizement, that we have likened our very existence to a process of self-preservation; namely, survival of the fittest. Which sure seems to be a convincing way of spinning our narcissism, by relating nature (red in tooth and claw) to the senseless slaughter of millions for pride's sake. Natural right? So too must be our heartless response. It's natural for us to turn a blind eye to the orphan, or the wounded, or stricken. We sure send our condolences, but when the luxurious recline as millions are slaughtered without intent of intervention, we call it natural; survival of the fittest.
Paul Rusesabagina, the main character in Hotel Rwanda, rescued over 1200 refugees when all hope seemed lost. Everything around him was burning. The world, as it must have seemed, had gone senseless. Bodies, piling daily in the streets, must have filled the air with a horrid stench. Yet, Paul continued working in the Hotel des Mille Collines, protecting his family and hundreds of guests. The odd thing to me, is that he never cracked. There was something super-human about him. Sure, his emotional side is shown in the film, and he does break down a couple times, but how many of us would have just quit, thrown in the towel, and just dropped dead?
After the movie, my wife looked up some biographical information on Paul. Interestingly, he was a Christian. At one point, he even considered the ministry. The film does not depict this more than the cross on his wife's neck, but now I know where his power derived from.
And this power is what really puts me to shame. Tomorrow, I will find myself numbered among people content with going through the motions on a weekly basis. They will sing their hymns, drop their tithes in a bucket, and go on their merry way. They hum the tune of salvation on their lips and blab about the hope they have in Christ at their Bible studies, but this set of motions is all their Christianity will ever mean to them, and this I find to be terrifying and shameful.
You see, Paul was not afraid to die. He knew that had he been killed, only paradise awaited him. Unlike everyone else seeking to preserve their own lives, Paul had compassion. Sure, he sought the preservation of his family, but in the end, he was the savior of over 1200 people. What a testimony to the selflessness of Christ who regarded not his own life, but the life of all that would follow him. That is not a rare form of heroism, it's Christianity.
Again, this is why I am ashamed to be counted among the ranks of men and women who will send their condolences, but never take the risk of leaving their comforts to be part of the solution. I get it, this is big talk and it must be followed through with a big walk. That's why Christ said that any man who followed him must be willing to take up his cross and die daily, that he must be willing to leave behind family and loved ones, and even lose this life to gain the one to come.
There is certainly exhortation there, but there is also great peace. Paul Rusesabagina knew that peace, and it was that peace that kept him walking amidst hell on earth. After watching this film, I knew that the gospel is the only hope for mankind. Evil, suffering, and pain have been the common experience for all of mankind throughout all history, but eternal life in Christ, has been the assurance for so many assuaged in the grips of terror and harm. I find shame in anyone willing to put their name on a church roster and continue preserving their life as if they are the fittest, even if they do "pray about it."
I understand the charge is harsh, but Jesus charged that in order to gain your life, you must lose it. There is a reason why we gather on Sunday, but it's not to be taken lightly. There is a reason we study Scripture, so that we may know of the hope of our inheritance. And there is a reason we sing our hearts song of worship, because we have hope that Christ bled and died, so in the day we too are bleeding out and breathing our last, we will spend eternity with Him. Just as those 1200 refugees, we will be liberated from this war torn and grief stricken world, to rejoice and celebrate the victory of our precious Savior and eternal King. As thousands are slaughtered and oppressed, we must be willing to leave the pews and stand boldly for life and hope in this generation. Any Christianity less than this, should be considered deplorable and shameful.
(On a side note, to the unbeliever or to the one bent on denying the hope we have in Christ. Look upon the bodies that lay in the streets of Rwanda, Darfur, Sudan, North Korea, Krakow... Look long and hard and think about those who died having their hope in Christ. Remember, that your ambition to disprove what they held sacred is to steal the very last shred of hope they had in this life. You are no better than their oppressor, for you seek to steal the very life they clung dearly to.)
Sadly, nothing jogs your conscience more than a movie depicting genocide. Personally, I believe the producers of Hotel Rwanda nailed it. They accomplished what they set out to do. I am absolutely shattered after watching it. On one hand, I am brought to share in the common experience of all mankind; evil, suffering, and pain. Yet, on the other I share it from the safety and comfort of my living room. My heart is strained by the realization that this is a recent event, and although my desire is to be part of the solution, I am simply going to eat some fried chicken and go to bed with my wife.My mind is set on overdrive. I know that there are similar atrocities occurring as I write this and as you read it. Yes, some are occurring in our back yard, and I promise, many are occurring all over the world. And let's face it, our country cannot be the police of all foreign affairs. Our foreign policy is only as good as the economic interest we have in a particular conflict. Unfortunately, shed blood does not automatically equate to revenue,
So I am led to wonder, "What hope is there of humanity?" Obviously, we exist in a bubble. A fat, wretched, conceited, immature, pretentious, ignorant bubble. We wine and dine as the world burns. We are fools, having sunken so far into self-aggrandizement, that we have likened our very existence to a process of self-preservation; namely, survival of the fittest. Which sure seems to be a convincing way of spinning our narcissism, by relating nature (red in tooth and claw) to the senseless slaughter of millions for pride's sake. Natural right? So too must be our heartless response. It's natural for us to turn a blind eye to the orphan, or the wounded, or stricken. We sure send our condolences, but when the luxurious recline as millions are slaughtered without intent of intervention, we call it natural; survival of the fittest.
Paul Rusesabagina, the main character in Hotel Rwanda, rescued over 1200 refugees when all hope seemed lost. Everything around him was burning. The world, as it must have seemed, had gone senseless. Bodies, piling daily in the streets, must have filled the air with a horrid stench. Yet, Paul continued working in the Hotel des Mille Collines, protecting his family and hundreds of guests. The odd thing to me, is that he never cracked. There was something super-human about him. Sure, his emotional side is shown in the film, and he does break down a couple times, but how many of us would have just quit, thrown in the towel, and just dropped dead?After the movie, my wife looked up some biographical information on Paul. Interestingly, he was a Christian. At one point, he even considered the ministry. The film does not depict this more than the cross on his wife's neck, but now I know where his power derived from.
And this power is what really puts me to shame. Tomorrow, I will find myself numbered among people content with going through the motions on a weekly basis. They will sing their hymns, drop their tithes in a bucket, and go on their merry way. They hum the tune of salvation on their lips and blab about the hope they have in Christ at their Bible studies, but this set of motions is all their Christianity will ever mean to them, and this I find to be terrifying and shameful.
You see, Paul was not afraid to die. He knew that had he been killed, only paradise awaited him. Unlike everyone else seeking to preserve their own lives, Paul had compassion. Sure, he sought the preservation of his family, but in the end, he was the savior of over 1200 people. What a testimony to the selflessness of Christ who regarded not his own life, but the life of all that would follow him. That is not a rare form of heroism, it's Christianity.
Again, this is why I am ashamed to be counted among the ranks of men and women who will send their condolences, but never take the risk of leaving their comforts to be part of the solution. I get it, this is big talk and it must be followed through with a big walk. That's why Christ said that any man who followed him must be willing to take up his cross and die daily, that he must be willing to leave behind family and loved ones, and even lose this life to gain the one to come.
There is certainly exhortation there, but there is also great peace. Paul Rusesabagina knew that peace, and it was that peace that kept him walking amidst hell on earth. After watching this film, I knew that the gospel is the only hope for mankind. Evil, suffering, and pain have been the common experience for all of mankind throughout all history, but eternal life in Christ, has been the assurance for so many assuaged in the grips of terror and harm. I find shame in anyone willing to put their name on a church roster and continue preserving their life as if they are the fittest, even if they do "pray about it."
I understand the charge is harsh, but Jesus charged that in order to gain your life, you must lose it. There is a reason why we gather on Sunday, but it's not to be taken lightly. There is a reason we study Scripture, so that we may know of the hope of our inheritance. And there is a reason we sing our hearts song of worship, because we have hope that Christ bled and died, so in the day we too are bleeding out and breathing our last, we will spend eternity with Him. Just as those 1200 refugees, we will be liberated from this war torn and grief stricken world, to rejoice and celebrate the victory of our precious Savior and eternal King. As thousands are slaughtered and oppressed, we must be willing to leave the pews and stand boldly for life and hope in this generation. Any Christianity less than this, should be considered deplorable and shameful.
(On a side note, to the unbeliever or to the one bent on denying the hope we have in Christ. Look upon the bodies that lay in the streets of Rwanda, Darfur, Sudan, North Korea, Krakow... Look long and hard and think about those who died having their hope in Christ. Remember, that your ambition to disprove what they held sacred is to steal the very last shred of hope they had in this life. You are no better than their oppressor, for you seek to steal the very life they clung dearly to.)
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